Épisode Pour que tu mentes encore S03E08 - Hannah Montana Saison 3

It's the Mack and Mickey in the Morning studio - Hannah Montana is on the stage performing 'Super Girl' while Mack and Mickey are doing some short dance moves along to it. As she finishes the verse, she sits back down opposite Mickey. 

MACK Wow! Not even in the shower do I sound that good. 
MICKEY It's true it's true. My dressing room is right next to his. Trust me he sounds like a cat getting his back waxed. 
MACK She's right I do. I'm super super WAA!
Mickey pitches at her ear. 
HANNAH Oh if I were you little baby I wouldn't want to come out now. 
MACK You're pregnant? I thought it was just to many trips to the snack table! We have a frozen yoghurt machine out there she doesn't even use a bowl! 
MICKEY I don't I really don't. It just goes straight down the shoot! (laughs; then turns to the audience seriously) But seriously. Pregnancy has taught me that good nutrition is no laughing matter. Which is why I'm going to have a healthy carrot right now. And so is everyone in the audience. Look under your chairs! You get a carrot! You get a carrot! You get a carrot. 
The audience look under their chairs and bring up their carrots amazed at what they have been given. 
HANNAH Seriously? The last show I was on everyone ... got a car. 
MACK Yeah but on Mack and Mickey you get rabbit food! 
MICKEY Yeah. We're just a cable show. 
A stagehand comes over with a tray of carrots for Mack and Mickey. The two of them take one and turn back to Hannah. 
MICKEY Oh don't worry Hannah we didn't leave you out. Enjoy. 
The stagehand offers her a carrot. 
HANNAH Oh no thank you. I don't like carrots. I don't really like anything with the word 'rot' in it. Could you imagine eating you know chicken 'rot' pie or spaghetti and 'rot' balls? I'm just saying. 
MACK You don't like carrots? 
MICKEY (referring to her pregnancy) He can hear you! 
MACK Oh you don't like c a r r o ... (turns away; unable to spell it) a .. carr a' t? 
MICKEY Come on! It's good for you. 
HANNAH No sorry. If this girls eating an orange snack ... it will be candy corn. 
MACK (still struggling to spell it) Carrot ... it's not a K is it? 
HANNAH Maybe we should get Mack a pen and paper. 
They smile at the camera. 

*** 

Later on outside Rico's Shack. Miley and Lily walk up from the beach onto the area outside the counter. 
LILY Next time you go on the show see if you can convince Mickey to name the baby Lily. How cute would that be! (she makes baby noises to a fake 'Lily' baby in the air) I'm done. 
The two of them walk over to the counter and take seats. 
MILEY Good. Because she's having a boy and she'll probably have to name it Bob so Mack has a chance at spelling it. 
Nearby a mother and a daughter are sitting a table with food from Rico's Shack. The mother is offering her daughter a carrot. 
DAUGHTER Mummy. I don't like carrots. 
LILY (referring to Miley) Hey just like you! 
MOTHER You loved carrots yesterday! 
DAUGHTER If Hannah Montana won't eat carrots I won't eat carrots. I'll eat candy corn. 
LILY Wow! What a nice little role model you are. 
MILEY OK that's just one kid. It's not like Hannah started the great 'carrot revolution'. 
Timely a radio DJ can be heard from a nearby radio. 
RADIO DJ (V/O) In other news Hannah Montana starts the great carrot revolution. 
MILEY Faceless radio reporter say what! 
RADIO DJ (V/O) Her rampage on Mack and Mickey has sent shock waves through the carrot industry! As kids across America ditch the healthy snack for Candy Corn! 
A group of kids walk past hassling their mother for 'candy corn'. 
KIDS We want candy corn! We want candy corn! We want candy corn! We want candy corn! 
Lily gives Miley a look. 
MILEY Don't look at me! Hannah said it. 
*** 
OPENING CREDITS 
starring MILEY CYRUS 
EMILY OSMENT 
MITCHELL MUSSO
JASON EARLES 
MOISES ARIAS 
and BILLY RAY CYRUS 
"HANNAH MONTANA" 
*** 

That night Miley is standing in the kitchen staring and talking to a carrot. 
MILEY I try so hard to stay out of trouble. I don't party with crazy celebrities. I don't use bad language. And then you walked into my life. You crunchy little creep! 
ROBBY Mile there's only one way to pay him back for what he did to you. (holds up chefs knife) Chop him! Chop him dead! 
MILEY Dad I'm being serious! Kid's all over America aren't eating carrots and it's all your fault! (she disposes of the carrot down the sink) 
ROBBY My fault!? Mile you've hated carrots ever since you was a baby. 
MILEY And that is your excuse? A responsible parent would've shoved it right into my toothless little mouth. But no! You had to roll over and give me cream spinach! (the two stare at each other) What kind of father are you! 
ROBBY Hey now just because the rest of the country's overreacting doesn't mean you have to. 
MILEY I am not overreacting! In fact I just thought of a rational intelligent solution to fix this whole 'carrot' sitchy-a-tation. 
*** 
Back in the Mack and Mickey in the Morning studio -- backstage Hannah is dressed in a carrot suit with Robby guised as her manager. 
ROBBYAre you telling me this is your rational intelligent solution? 
MILEY Well this is as good as it gets when the brain forms without carrots!
She walks onstage. 
*** 
In her carrot suit Hannah performs a mixed version of "Super Girl" with the qualities of a carrot employed. 
HANNAH Everybody's crunching me I clear you skin and help you see! I'm super super! I'm super super carrot. 
The audience applaud. 
*** 
Jackson Oliver and Rico are standing around the counter at Rico's surf shack checking out the girls on the beach. 
OLIVER Aye! 
RICO Aye 'I' Aye! 
JACKSON Aye I' Aye Aye! Back off boys and let the master of cool show you how to make a first impression. 
As Jackson jumps from his position behind the counter he stumbles and falls. Getting himself back up he looks over to see that the girl didn't watch him fall. 
JACKSON She didn't see! Still in the game! 
OLIVER Not when she gets a load of smokin Okin! Watch this! (he starts to walk over to the girl) 
JACKSON In your dreams my friend! (offended; Oliver turns back) 
OLIVER I saw her first! 
JACKSON I'm older! 
OLIVER I'm taller! 
JACKSON / OLIVER I'm cuter! 
The two of them 'tut' at each other following this remark. 
RICO I'll tell you what you both are. Not that guy! (as Rico points the two of them look over and see the cute girl hug another boy) Face it. When you got it you got it. And when you don't ... you're you guys. 
JACKSON Oh I got it! 
OLIVER Yeah so do I! But my mom made me take an oatmeal bath and she doesn't want me to sweat out on my first day. 
Photographer Liza (last seen in season one's "Smells like Teen Sellout") appears and walks over to them. 
LIZA [in reference to Jackson and Oliver] You are ... PERFECT! (she spins their heads a couple of times) I have been looking for IT all day and you two have got IT! 
OLIVER Yeah but I just took an oatmeal bath and ... 
Before he can finish Jackson nudges him in the stomach. 
JACKSON You were saying? 
LIZA I need two models and you two lucky ducks fit the bill. Ha ha ha! Get it? Duck ... bill? 
JACKSON If we laugh do we get the job? 
LIZA Yes. 
The two of them burst out into fake laughter as Liza turns to walk away. 
JACKSON (through laughter) Stop it! It hurts!
RICO Wait a minute! You want them to be models? For what? Hockey masks? And even then ... they're still the ice lids. You see some of them! 
LIZA Actually I'm doing an ad for a dating service called "Dream Match" and I want to use you two to show girls the kind of hot guys just waiting to meet them. 
JACKSON And I can't wait to meet the girls who can't wait to meet me. Jackson Stewart. (shakes hands with Liza) Hot guy! Tss! 
LIZA Ohh! Hahaha. 
Oliver walks over to the counter and reaches for his soda.
OLIVER And me ... Oliver Oiken. Other cute guy. 
As he reaches for the drink and places it to his mouth the straw goes up his nose. 
OLIVER Oh! Argh! 
Jackson looks on in annoyance at Oliver. 
*** 
Back at the Mack and Mickey in the Morning Show studio the three of them (Hannah dressed in a carrot suit) are sitting on seats on the stage. 
MICKEY And we're back with Hannah Montana! 
Hannah holds up a carrot she is holding. 
MICKEY Oh and she looks so cute I could just dip her in Ranch dipping and eat her right up! 
MACK Trust me she could! Lunch truck came by yesterday ... just the tires drove off. 
HANNAH Just tires! Hahahaha. (taps Mickey with the carrot)
MICKEY I know! 
HANNAH (turns to audience) But seriously. I just want to tell all the kids out there that Hannah Montana thinks carrots are great! And from now on -- (she takes a bite out of her carrot and it stays in between her teeth) I'll eat them everyday! Mmm. Good. 
MICKEY Oh and so true about them being good for your eyes. 
MACK And how! I put down half a carrot cake last night and finished the final Harry Potter book! Can you believe that ending!
MICKEY (referring to her pregnancy) Ssshhh! We're still reading book four. 
MACK Really? Those books are enormous no wonder you're so big! (turns to audience) No wonder she's so big! Yeahh! 
MICKEY So Hannah - have you read the Harry Potter's? 
HANNAH You know what I like waiting for the movies. I mean with my busy schedule who has time for reading? But I'll always make time for carrot eating! 
She turns to the audience and chews on her carrot again. 
*** 
At Miley's house Lily and Miley are sitting on the couch watching the afternoon news. 
NEWSREADER (V/O) Now she loves carrots -- but hates books! What's next for this troubled teen? 
MILEY Oh boy. 
NEWSREADER (V/O) All across America ... children are refusing to read. Here at East Northumberland Elementary school kids have closed their story books and are saying ... 
CHILDREN (V/O) Wait for the movie like Hannah! 
Miley switches off the television. 
MILEY Well ... on the bright side I made a lot of carrot farmers happy. 
Robby is standing in the kitchen eating a fudge ice cream - the kitchen is full of carrot trees. 
ROBBY You know to bad you didn't say you hated fudgy buddies. 
LILY Oh or you could've said you hated Orlanda Bloom. Oh! Then you'd have boxes and boxes of Bloom. 
MILEY OK! Hello! Pop star in the toilet here. 
ROBBY Oh come on honey I know you're worried about this ... but it'll all blow over. 
LILY Yeah your Dad's right. I mean it's not like it's some international crisis. 
MILEY Oh really? 
Miley switches on the television again. 
NEWSREADER (V/O) It's an international crisis! Kids all across the globe are waiting for the movie. In France ... In Sweden ... even in China. 
Lily gestures a flushing toilet in an attempt to cheer Miley up. Miley just stares back. 
***
Miley is pacing around behind the couch talking on the phone to the press. Lily is on the couch. 
MILEY But you can't print that! I never said I didn't like reading. Hold on I'm getting another call. Please be one of those funny caveman trying to sell me car insurance! 
LILY You shouldn't even be talking to the press! Let me handle this. (as she walks over she takes Miley's phone) Leave Brittany Alone! 
MILEY Brittany? 
LILYOh sorry my bad. Leave Hannah Alone! 
Robby walks down. 
ROBBY Mile I just got off the phone with ... what are you yelling at me for? We're all on the same side here. 
LILY Oh I'm sorry I was just .. you know taking it ... 
MILEY It outside. (Miley pushes Lily out) 
LILY (as she walks out) Leave Hannah -- (alone) 
As she walks out to the porch she gives a thumbs up. 
ROBBY RAY Hey I got some great news for you. Just talked to Mack and Mickey and they're gonna let you go back on the show tomorrow and straighten this whole mess out! 
MILEY Oh great! So I can go back and put my big mouth on television in front of millions of people! Why didn't I think of that? 
ROBBY Oh no honey. This thing ain't gonna go away till you get back out there and undo what you did when you tried to undo what you did when you did it the first time you done did it. 
MILEY But what if when I try to undo what I did when I tried to undo what I did done I do again what I did before when I tried to undo what I did? 
ROBBY If you're afraid you're gonna put your foot in your big mouth again we might need to hire a world class expert in what I like to call the 'double talking' don't you know? 
Jackson walks down the stairs in his model clothes strutting like a model. 
JACKSON Hello non models! 
MILEY You don't mean ... 
ROBBY Heaven help me yes I do. 
*** 
While Lily is outside getting the press from Hannah's back Robby and Miley are sitting in the lounge room listening to Jackson. 
JACKSON Alright let's dosy do this thing. So - (to Miley) what's your favorite color? 
MILEY That's easy. Purple. 
JACKSON No no no no! Cargo rule of double talk. Never give a straight answer. Straight answers are death. 
MILEY But it's the truth. 
JACKSON The truth is DEATH. By saying you like purple you just alienated every other color in the rainbow. You say that tomorrow and millions of little girls in pink t-shirts are gonna hate your guts. 
MILEY OK then how am I supposed to answer the question? 
JACKSON Somebody asks you a question you just give them the old ... (makes creepy gestures with his hands) razzle dazzle! Alright look Dad. Ask me something. Anything. 
ROBBY OK. Did you do your homework today son? 
JACKSONDad. I can't tell you how good it makes me feel that you care so much about my education. You know I was actually talking about that with Max when we were shooting hoops and ... oh my gosh that reminds me! His Dad has Laker Tickets and was wondering if you wanted to go! 
ROBBY Are you kidding me! Give me his number and I'll -- (as he reaches for the phone he realizes what has happened) Whoa - he is good. 
MILEY OK let me try it again. 
JACKSON OK. So Hannah what's your favorite color? 
MILEY Oh! That's funny you should ask. You see I was actually talking about that with my friend Lola ... 
JACKSON Good start now kick it up a notch. 
MILEY ... On our way to San Diego. 
JACKSON San Diego and kick it! 
MILEY In Donald Trumps Golden Blimp ... 
JACKSON Yes! 
MILEYAnd we were looking over the majestic pacific ... 
JACKSON Don't offend the other oceans!
MILEY The majestic mighty waters ... 
JACKSON Nice save now take me home! 
MILEY And I just thought about how lucky I am to live in such a beautiful ... magical ... world! 
JACKSON And so the student becomes the master ... my work here is done ... yarda yarda yarda. Now if you'll excuse me I have to unleash this ... (makes a fishy kiss) on the world! 
As he walks out Robby stops. 
ROBBY Hey hold on just a minute son ... did you actually finish your homework or not? 
JACKSON Come on Dad. Next year I go off to college and you're not going to be there to constantly hound me about my homework. That's something I'm going to have to do for myself and ... that's never going to happen unless you start backing off. 
ROBBY I'm sorry Jackson you're right. (Robby takes a seat next to Miley as Jackson walks out) 
MILEY Dad! 
ROBBY Oh sweet Pete he got me again! 
MILEY Well on the plus side ... he's got lawyer written all over him. 
*** 
Outside Rico's Shack Jackson and Oliver are strutting in front of the camera that Liza is holding. They do some dance moves as well. 
LIZA That's it that's it! Now show me angry! (they show anger) Yes! Now show me ... sad! (they express sadness) I love it! Now strut! (they do this) Now show me your inner tiger! Now you're on fire so burn me baby burn me! Yes! 
*** 
Later on outside Rico's Shack Jackson Oliver and Rico are looking at the magazine Liza's photos are in -- Jackson and Oliver have made a fool of themselves ... 
OLIVER Why settle for average? 
JACKSON When you can have a dream match? 
RICO At last. My world makes sense again. Up is up. Down is down and losers are still losers. 
JACKSON We are not losers! We're ... average. 
RICO Don't worry your (ruffles Jackson and Oliver's hair) average little heads boys. Nobody buys that magazine anyway. 
OLIVER Yeah!
JACKSON Yeah! 
OLIVER Yeah!
JACKSON Yeah! 
Jackson and Oliver high five each other. 
RICO That's why I had this made. 
Rico directs a remote at a bush opposite them; the bush falls to reveal an enlarged billboard of the poster in the magazine. 
RICO [teasing] Roar! 
Jackson and Oliver look away in embarrassment as Rico walks off. 
*** 
Back at the Mack and Mickey in the Morning studio - Hannah is sitting on the stage alongside Mack and Mickey. 
HANNAH (reading from script)So just again to be perfectly clear reading is a wonderful thing. And I Hannah Montana strongly recommend it to all my fans. And even kids who aren't my fans because reading is that important. Pick up nail polish remover and floss -- Sorry. I have to get that on the way home. I should've stopped reading but once I started it was just so darn fun! (looks down at script) the end. 
The audience applaud her speech. 
MACK Well said. 
Robby gives her a thumbs up from backstage. 
MICKEY You know Hannah I'm always looking for a great book what's your favorite? 
HANNAH My favorite? 
MACK Mine is James and the Giant Peach. I just love the idea of a big peach! 
MICKEY Mack no one cares. (turns to Hannah) So Hannah you were saying? 
HANNAH Well you know I just ... I just love ... so many ... many ... many books! And you know what you should see the stack of books on my bedside table. Which is a gorgeous table by the way. I got it on tour ... in Japan. Yeah what a fascinating country. As all the countries are in this beautiful magical world. 
MICKEY It is it is. It is isn't it. It's a magical world full of books. (turns to Hannah) And your favorite would be? 
HANNAH Well you know. I don't really like picking favorites. I think of books as. .. ur kids. Little paperback bubbas of joy! So how could you expect a mother to pick her favorite. 
MACK My mom did. My brother Marvin. Who grew up to be a bald unhappy pharmacist in Long Beach. Who looks good now mom? 
MICKEY Hahahaha. Five days a week people. (gestures five to Hannah) So Hannah why don't we take some questions from your fans in the audience? 
HANNAH Great! I love my fans. And people who aren't my fans. I love everybody in this beautiful magical world. 
The audience applaud as Hannah gestures at a girl with a microphone to talk. 
ISOBELHi I'm Isabell. And I'm confused. I used to like carrots but then you said you hated them so then I hated them .. . then you said you liked them so .. do I like them now or not? 
HANNAH Of course. Carrots are wonderful. 
ISABELLThen why did you say you hated them? Where you lying! 
HANNAH Ar ... Well Isabell. That question took a whole lot of courage. And speaking of courage what about that Washington crossing the Delaware! Oh oh! That reminds me. What did Dela wear? Maybe a ... New Jersey. I dunno. I'll ask her! (the audience doesn't laugh) Like Alaska ... aha ... next question. 
Another small girl in the audience stands up with a microphone. 
GIRL I used to love reading but then you said you hated it and then now you say you like it again and ... I just don't know what to do! (crying she falls into her mums lap)
HANNAH Oh no honey. Don't cry! Just because I don't like reading doesn't mean you don't have to. 
Isabell stands again. 
ISABELLSo you don't like reading again! 
HANNAH I didn't say that! 
ISABELLYes you did! 
HANNAH OK OK what I meant was ... 
GIRL Argh! Make up your mind! You're right Mom celebrities are flakes. You're a flake! You're right ... 
MICKEY Seriously Hannah it is a bit confusing ... I mean this kids look up to you. You should just choose your words more carefully. 
HANNAH That's what I'm trying to do! 
ISABELLWell you're not doing a very good job! 
Hannah looks over to Robby; and he gestures for her to speak from her heart. 
HANNAH OK listen! This is what I'm not doing. I'm not being straightforward with you guys. The truth is ... I hate carrots. I always have. I always will. Let me see a show of hands of how many of you guys actually like every single vegetable. 
No one in the audience raise their hand; Mack raises his. 
HANNAH Every vegetable? (Mack nods) Brussel sprouts? 
MACK (drops hand) To be fair I didn't know that was a vegetable. 
MICKEY That's OK That's OK 
HANNAH (to audience) And hey. I love books and I wish I had more time for reading but I don't. And just because I can't doesn't mean you shouldn't. I mean if one of your friends didn't like carrots or didn't read much would that stop you from eating carrots or reading? (they all say 'no') Right. So don't do what I do just because I'm famous. 
MACK I think what Hannah's saying here is her likes and dislikes are no more important than yours. Self worth comes from you not from others. 
Including Mickey and Hannah the audience stare at Mack like they just saw a ghost. 
MACK Well that's right not just another pretty face people. But it is pretty isn't it! 
HANNAH So do you guys have anymore questions for me? I promise to be honest. 
ISABELL What's your biggest secret? 
HANNAH OK! Now it's time for a beautiful magical commercial! 
*** 
Rico with a towel over his shoulder walks over to the billboard with Jackson and Oliver's humiliating photos held up. 
RICO See you tomorrow losers! 
As Rico walks off Jackson and Oliver peek their heads out of both the toilet cubicles and run towards the billboard. 
JACKSON Go go go! 
The two of them attempt to stretch over a cover over the billboard; they struggle. Unbeknown to them Liza is behind them taking photos. 
LIZA Great! 
They make their way out of the cover as Liza takes another humiliating photo of them. 
LIZA Average with just a hint of dumb! This'll be perfect for your next ad. 
Jackson and Oliver walk over and confront her. 
JACKSON Next ad? 
LIZA Arvins Learning centre. Go from brainless ... to brilliant! 
JACKSON Forget it lady. You humiliated us once and you're not going to do it again. What you call average we call real. So maybe we don't look like that guy! Who does! 
OLIVER Well that guy does ... 
Jackson nudges him in the stomach. 
JACKSONWe're not going to apologize for who we are! 
OLIVER Yeah! 
JACKSON And there is nothing ... 
OLIVER Nothing! 
JACKSON In this world that would ever make us compromise our integrity EVER again. 
OLIVER Ever again! 
LIZA I'll give you each a thousand dollars. 
JACKSON So like mildly dumb or super dumb? 
OLIVER We can do it all! 
The two of them pose an idiotic look as Liza takes a snap.

Source : twiztv